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I don't know why I didn't invite my daughter to come. I felt if my daughter came on this trip, she would take all the attention away from the girls because she always had to be the center of attention.Later, it was mentioned to me that this hurt her very much and I can certainly understand how that might have happened. I wanted them to have the attention from the family because I felt they were more needy than she. So I decided to take the girls without my daughter.I thought it would be good for them to connect to some of their distant relatives on my mom's side of the family.Also, I did not have money for Christmas and this was a good way to get around the problem.My daughter carried through with her promise and I got some much needed "escape" on occasional weekends because she babysat for me.She helped with cleaning the house and there was always a ton of housework. She wanted to be in the same bedroom with them and she was by now, in her early twenties and they, much younger, were influenced by her smoking in their bedroom, cursing and cynical, critical attitude.

funny rules for dating my daughter-53

I could go on and on about all the things I did that I thought were being a good mother. Seeing my sister die at only 35, the sober reality of how short life really is hit me in the face like cold water. She once told me during a particularly hard time in High School "If it weren't for Joe, I'd be on drugs or pregnant." I was so happy that he took delight in listening to all of her teenage problems, give her counsel and advice.Even before I remarried, she had rose buds in her cheeks again, looked better, ate better, seemed happier.Several years later, when my mom died, I took in my other sister's 3 girls because my sister was a serious alcoholic and unable to care for them. My little girl with her long brown hair, came running to me with flowers she had (illegally) picked at school. Sometimes when I grieve for her and cry for her, I vivid memory come to me--- a day I was sitting out in the backyard and the school bus dropped her off in front of the house.No one else stepped forward to this incredible responsibility. My own two children were grown and out of the house.